10 Surefire Principles to Cement Relational Equity

Recently, I have been reading Daniel Goleman's landmark classic, Emotional Intelligence: 10th Anniversary Edition; Why It Can Matter More Than IQ.   In this work, he found that, all things being equal, emotional intelligence was a critical success factor middle executives with similar IQ levels, in terms of their effectiveness in moving ahead with their careers.

Zig Ziglar, in his book Success for Dummies, refers to ten factors for success in human relations.  And you had better be interested in how you manage your relationships, because out of the key things everyone wants (happiness, health, prosperity, security, peace of mind, and hope, good family relationships, friendships) in terms of success, most of them hinge on the degree to which you are successful in building and maintaining personal and professional relationships.

Here is Zig's Top Ten Commandments of Human Relations:

1. Have unshakable integrity, a good attitude, a thorough knowledge of the skills necessary to do the job well (this applies to your work/career)
2. Smile and speak to people.  You can be responsible for creating either an environment of positivity and enthusiasm, or complaining and pessimism.  And believe me, your upper management notices these attitudes.
3. Call people by name.  Remember, personalizing your conversation really makes a difference.  And do whatever it takes to increase your ability to remember people's names.
4. Be helpful, friendly, and encouraging.  Work on being a go giver, and on focusing on others, rather than being consumed with yourself and with your day.  If you focus on giving, you will receive back in the measure you give of yourself to others.
5. Speak and act as if everything you do is a genuine pleasure.  Alfred Adler, one of the great psychologists, spoke of the importance of acting as if.  As we choose to adopt an attitude of gratitude, we will develop positive enthusiasm for our life circumstances, and for the people around us.
6. Be genuinely interested in other people.  You never know what each person may be dealing with.  Get off the WIIFM station (What's In It For Me), and start tuning in to the interests, needs, and hopes of others, with an eye toward serving them.
7. Be generous with your praise and careful with your criticism.  Give grace to the customers and co-workers you deal with.  Every person has their own story.  If someone seems overly negative or critical, don't take the bait: move on.
8. Be considerate of the feelings of others.
9. Be of service to others.  Set a goal each day to do at least one positive thing to be of service to a customer or to a co-worker.
10. Develop a good sense of humor.  Learn to laugh often, and Don't Sweat the Small Stuff.

One of the key character traits I observed in one of my best friends from college days  was his keen interest in each person he spoke with.  He peppered them with questions.  He truly wanted to know about them, and how they were doing.  And, inevitably, people wanted to be around him and follow his lead.  Today, he is a successful CEO of his very successful organization.  And it's because, almost unconsciously, he helps people around him feel good about who they are and what they are doing.

Please let me know of any other ideas you think of that can help build up the relationships in our lives.

Kindly Bookmark and Share it: