A critical personal success factor on the road to greatness is going to be your ability to focus. Average people never make it to greatness because they make 3 key mistakes. Fortunately, you can now identify these detours and correct your course so that you can stay on track in your journey of personal growth development.
This post is based on The Compassionate Samurai: Being Extraordinary in an Ordinary World, by Brian Klemmer. In his chapter on Focus, he identifies these three mistakes.
The first mistake average people make is being unable or unwilling to focus. The very definition of successful focus is as follows: "the ability to direct your attention, efforts, or activity at a desired direction or object without being distracted." Of course, you cannot focus on a target that does not exist. The key success factor in greatness is to get clear on your personal mission, vision, values, and goals, and then to execute consistently, day in and day out. Once you have the target, the next key is to be able to focus on it.
The example Brian Klemmer gives of the ability to both focus and relax is as follows. His first mentor, Tom, was hosting a personal mastery seminar for some top people from all different walks of life. The entrance fee to the seminar was $7,500, indicating the commitment of those who attended. During the course of the seminar, Tom announced an exercise. They were going to practice rifle shooting. Each person who wished to participate would put $100 into the kitty. Each person would get to fire five rounds at the target, and the person closest to bull's eye would win. Forty people entered, so the total kitty was $4,000.
The first person carefully took aim. Just as he was about to fire, Tom yelled in his ear. The person was startled, of course, and missed by a lot. Tom continued to yell and harass the participants. Finally, at the end, he took aim himself. Of course, all 40 contestants joined in screaming at him. But he was not distracted, hit his mark, and won the $4,000.
The point of the excercise, he stated, was to illustrate that all of us, in aiming at the target of greatness in the form of our specific mission and goals, hear screaming and yelling in the form of all types of financial and time pressures. Average people fold, or get distracted from their main goals, when they face money pressures, time pressures, phone calls which disrupt work plans, work interfering with relationships, problems with relationships interfering with careers. Above average people face life head on, and tackle their problems.
How about you? Have you developed the mindset that nothing will distract you, day in and day out, from taking the key actions you need to accomplish your goals. (You can read more on this topic by referring to my article on critical success factors).
The best rifle marksman/markswoman is the one who can both focus and relax. Too much tenseness, and the person will miss the target. S/he has to be relaxed. Too much relaxation and not enough focus, and they will also miss the target. Both focus and relaxation are needed.
The second mistake that average people make is that they focus on things that make them ineffective. One wrong focus is self-centerdness. When we are trying to maneuver every situation to serve ourselves, we fall into this trap. One of the main quotes I liked from is as follows: "The compassionate samurai focus on service or contribution, regardless of their circumstances."
One of the key strategies that you can utilize from the study of the compassionate samurai warriors is to focus on death. "What?! Are you nuts?!," you may say.
Here is a quote from The Code of the Samurai, by Thomas Cleary.
"As long as you keep death in mind at all times, you will also fulfill the ways of loyalty and familial duty. You will also avoid myriad evils and calamities, you will be physically sound and healthy, and you will live a long life., What is more, your character will improve and your virtue will grow.
When you assume that your stay in this world will last, various wishes occur to you, and you become very desirous. You want what others have, and cling to your own possessions, developing a mercantile mentality."
In other words, by living each day with a focus on realizing that it could be your last, you will remember to focus on contribution and service. However, when you get caught up with the notion that you will live long, or forget how finite life is, it's easier to lose focus on compassion and service.
Another critical mistake people make with ineffective focus is living in and focusing on regret. What do elite athletes have in common? They have the ability to forget their mistakes. Now, this does not mean that they do not learn from their mistakes. However, they are able to forget the mistake and continue to focus on their goal: winning! Tiger Woods, for example, can fire a shot into the sand or into the trees on one shot, but then hit a birdie or hole in one on the next. His focus on victory and on his abilities is greater than his focus on his mistakes. The apostle Paul, one of the earliest pioneers of Christianity, got this right: he forgot what was behind him (he killed and tortured the earliest Christian converts), and he strove to fulfill his mission to take the message of Christianity (after his conversion) to the ends of the earth. You can read his statement about forgetting here.
To apply this example to you, what do you focus on when you 'fail' or 'make mistakes?'
--Can you forget the time your spouse neglected your anniversary and did not get you a card?
--Can you forget the time that you were passed over for a promotion?
--Can you forget your worst personal failure from the past?
--If you cannot completely forget, can you at least allow your past mistakes, or your perceived wrongs from others, to at least become neutral so that it does not rent space in your head for free?
On the flip side, elite athletes do not overly dwell on their victories. It's easy to get comfortable with a certain level of success and lose focus on the greatness of choosing more and greater goals. Kobe Bryant is a great example of an athlete with a burning desire to win such that he is on the court before any of his teammates, often shooting more shots and practicing longer. Don't let your measure of success keep you from a philosophy of continuous and never ending improvement.
Finally, the third mistake that average people make in the area of focus is that they are focused, but are still unaware of what surrounds them. I personally, have been challenged in this area. I have had no trouble focusing intently on my work goals, because I am most comfortable doing so. But at times in my life, I have been unaware that my focus on work has come at the expense of my other roles in life: father, husband, follower of God, friend. Or, I have been so focused on a problem or goal that I am not present with the person I am with. The key strategy is to be focused on being all here wherever you are. In the words of Brian Klemmer, "Not being here now kills effectiveness and intimacy."
I hope that you will take the time to review these mistakes, and commit to focusing properly, so that you, too, can become the compassionate Samurai warrior that you need to become.
Click Here! for excellent resources for Personal Growth Development
Other suggested resources:
Mike Magdaleno has a great podcast and website called, The Warrior Life.
Here are a handful of books that can help you with your focus and concentration, so that you can execute on the road to greatness.
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