If you and I are on this orbiting planet for a span of just a few years (relative to eternity), should we not live life to the full?
In the next series of posts, I am going to be sharing some insights from positive psychology author Sonja Lyubomirsky, Ph.D., author of “The How of Happiness
Life is not just about being happy, but I want you to think about life from this standpoint:
We each have the choice of our attitude and outlook on life: we can either choose to be unhappy, depressed, and miserable; or we can choose to be faith-filled, courageous, and realistically optimistic.
The first personal success factor for an optimal life is actually celebrated throughout the Bible.
Jesus Christ modeled this positive practice throughout His life on earth in the following passages:
Matthew 15:36; Matthew 26:26; Mark 8:6; Mark 14:22; Luke 22:19; John 6:23.
What exactly is this first strategy for positive life change?
It’s the practice of counting your blessings, otherwise known as giving thanks!
If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, “thank you,” that would suffice. ~Meister Eckhart
Why is it that such a simple practice is so neglected?
Here are some reasons I can think of off the top of my head:
Some of us are just more geared toward pessimism.
When going through stress and hard times, it may be even harder.
And if we have a habit of complaining or pessimism, it takes more effort to give thanks than it does to complain.
It’s not too late to change.
Contrary to what you may believe, you are not a prisoner of your past or of your habits. You can change the course of your life starting today.
Here are some suggestions to help you develop an attitude of gratitude
Be Aware of the Benefits of Gratitude
Upward Spirals
Positive psychology researchers have shown that gratitude can promote upward spirals in your life. Think about it: when you start thinking about your blessings, it may prompt you to do something to express your thanks. When you express your thanks to a person in your life, it may prompt that person to offer you a favor or opportunity. That opportunity could be something that changes your life. All because you decided to give thanks.
Improved Mental, Physical and Spiritual Health
I don’t have a ream of statistics to share with you on this point, but medical researches have well documented the link between the mind and body. The more you practice gratitude, the more faith and courage you will muster. And the more positive you are in mind and spirit, the more healthy your body will be. Negative, depressed patterns of thinking take a toll on your body, mind, and emotions!
The Pursuit of Happiness: Gratitude Exercises
Here are some gratitude exercises to help you create a new outlook on life:
Decide to Be Grateful
Once you have examined and become convinced of the benefits of gratitude, you’ve got to commit to develop the discipline of gratitude in your life. i would encourage you to post some stickis on your dashboard, at your computer at work, or even on your bathroom mirror. “Practice Gratitude”
Keep a Gratitude Journal
There is something about writing things down that makes them even more real. Take time to write down at least 5 things you are grateful for on a daily basis. Do this for 21 days in a row, and you’ll find that gratitude changes your thinking and outlook on life.
Practice a Fears to Gratitude List
If you are going through an experience where you tend to be depressed or anxious, this can be a very helpful practice. Draw a line down the center of a page in your gratitude journal. On one side, list all the fears going through your mind. On the other side, right a gratitude statement that corrects or counters the fear.
For example:
I’m afraid I’ll lose my job. “I’m grateful that God will provide for all my needs”
I’m afraid my child will get cancer. “I’m grateful that God watches over all of His children. He knows what is best, and will be with me in every trial”
Choose a Specific Time Each Day to Give Thanks
I have found that giving thanks before going to bed seems to set the tone for my sleep and for my waking attitude. By focusing on my blessings, it puts me in a positive frame of mind, both conscious and unconscious.
Use Photos or Art to Express Your Gratitude
If you have a smart phone, you can take pictures to preserve images of loved ones, or of positive memories you have recently had. or you can draw out what you are grateful for. Pictures have a way of connecting our
Practice Expressing Thanks to Friends, Co-Workers, Neighbors, and Colleagues
Written Thanks:
One of my goals this year includes sending a thank you to every person who refers a new client to me. This post is inspiring me, because I have a few cards to write already! At work, you may have the opportunity to nominate co-workers for jobs well done. If you do not have a formal recognition program, you can at least write them a thank you note.
You may also want to consider writing brief thank you notes of gratitude to different friends in your life. Just because. This is also a good business networking practice. People love to feel appreciated!
Use texting or e-mail.
In this 21st century, this is a very postive use for technology, and a very easy way to express thanks to people in your life.
>Spoken Thanks
Take time to call someone on the phone just to let them know what you are grateful for: their friendship, something they may have done for you recently, or just that you know them.
For years, I’ve made a habit of calling my parents every Friday morning just to touch base and to keep our relationship current. We always end the conversation with an “I love you.” Years after they are gone, I will always remember our Friday morning conversations.
photo credit: AlicePopkorn
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Hi Steve,
Cultivating the attitude is one of the most powerful habits you can have. It is almost impossible to imagine how much positive energy you get from it if you have never have practiced it yourself. I did it once for a whole week and I was blown away of the results.
I love your list of gratitude exercises: it is a great compilation of practical ways to be grateful
Thanks for sharing
marc van der Linden recently posted…What meaning do you give to your life?
Thanks, Marc, for your example in working on the helpful mental habits. I remember you mentioned going through Tony Robbins’ 10 day mental diet. I find it’s so important to watch my thinking and attitudes moment by moment to make sure I am open to the best things in life.
Steve-Personal Success Factors recently posted…Live Life To The Full!
Yea some people put an elastic band on their wrist to ensure they never enter negative states.
Stop the wolf at the door..!
Great post
Another well done inspirational article Steve. Independent to a fault, I’m someone who cringes at the very thought of placing labels on people, but in this case I really do believe some people are by nature prone to negativity. No clue where it comes, but I’ve always been a very positive person – in fact I find it really difficult to be around people who are always look for what’s wrong in the world. I believe happiness isn’t something we find out there in the world, it’s a state we choose. So when someone says to me “I want to be happy” my response has always been, “Great! What are you waiting for?”
marquita herald recently posted…Visualization: Seeing is Believing … Not Necessarily Achieving
Marquita, it’s an interesting thought that some people are just naturally more positive, while others are naturally inclined to be more pessimistic. The great thing is that, even if we are more inclined toward negativity, we are not bound to it: we can learn new ways of thinking, new attitudes. That’s the premise of Martin Seligman’s book, Learned Optimism. Thanks for your input.
Hey Steve,
Loved this! I especially loved your “Practice a Fears to Gratitude List.” I never heard of this practice and think it’s brilliant! What a great way to transform fears and anxiety and place them in a context that loosens their hold on those currently bound by them!
Happiness without gratitude is not happiness. So attaching gratitude to places in our lives not normally associated with gratitude is so important!
Thanks for the share, Steve!
KenWert@MeanttobeHappy recently posted…The Sexiness of Happiness
Ken, thank you so much for stopping by. I believe the above practice comes out of 12 step recovery circles: there’s a lot of wisdom that comes from that arena. 🙂
Hi Stephen,
Thanks for great article!
I like the idea of using photos to express gratitude. I think that photos can “say” more than words. I use very often photos to express my feelings and emotions.
Edita, thanks much! What are some ways that you have used picture in your life? Do you keep them in an album or journal? Also, I’m curious as to whether you have a vision board?
Hi Stephen,
I like taking photos. Taking the photos helps me to express myself. I keep them in my album or I create videos with some good music.
I don’t have a vision board. Do you have any tips how to create it?
Hi, Edyta! Thanks for the great information. I have an app on my iPhone, called Live Happy, that is very similar.
Here’s an article from Oprah Winfrey’s site that will help you in creating a vision board.
Thanks Stephen for sharing it with me. I am sure that it will help me.
Really good post Stephen. I believe that by giving thanks we receive back in abundance and we don’t really have to ask for it.
Thanks, Hiten!
Stephen!!! I love love love this article!
Every word resonated me on a very deep level…and I am so thankful to you for writing this and also for your support all throughout last year. May this year be even better 🙂
Much Love and Gratitude,
Z~
p.s. I’m a BIG fan of the gratitude journal! ofcourse mine are now digitized 😉
Zeenat{Positive Provocations} recently posted…Simply Empowering Steps to attain your goals
Zeenat, I know the subjects of love, joy, and happiness are close to your heart. Thank you for all you do to change the world through your Positive Provocations Blog. I’m honored to have you stop by! 🙂