Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow, it only saps today of its joy. ~Leo Buscaglia
“You must be insane! Do you know how much sleep I lose over worry? Do you know how tied up in knots my stomach is? Doesn’t worry affect my health?!”
Ok, so worry in and of itself may not be so healthy or good for your career. But, if you respond successfully to worry, you will uncover some strategic planning strategies that will benefit you!
Success Factor #1: Eat Right, Exercise, and Relax!
The opposite of relaxation is tension. And tension, over time, takes a toll, physically, on your body. Earlier this week, I learned a fascinating statistic while listening to a psychiatrist present about the risk of depression. If you practice good nutrition, exercise, and meditation, you can reduce your chances of getting depression by 30%! However, if you do not practice these disciplines, you increase your chance of getting depression by 50%!
Accept Your Worrying!
At the same time, decide and commit to at least 3-4 times a week of physical fitness. And learn how to practice mindfulness/meditation, even 5 minutes at a time during a break in your day. Watch what you eat, and increase your intake of fruits and vegetables. Take omega-3 fatty acids in the form of fish oil pills (Kirkland Signature Natural Fish Oil Concentrate with Omega-3 Fatty Acids-400 Softgels
Beginner Resources:
From my own experience, I will share with you that the Wii Fit Plus with Balance Board
As a Christian, I like to utilize Christian meditation resources. Richard Foster, in his book Celebration of Discipline, the Path to Spiritual Growth, Revised and Expanded
A helpful self-help workbook for meditation and relaxation is The Relaxation & Stress Reduction Workbook (New Harbinger Self-Help Workbook)
Intermediate and Advanced Resources:
In addition to the Wii Fit, I also have spent some time watching the Biggest Loser on television, and was inspired by trainer Jillian Michaels. Her set of DVD’s (Jillian Michaels 3 DVDs: 30 Day Shred – Banish Fat, Boost Metabolism – No More Trouble Zones
Of course, I one of my neighbors mocked me, as he was working his way through P90X Plus – Workout DVD
You may also want to consider running! I’m biased here, because I ran my first 5K race last summer, and I just ran my first full marathon last Sunday! I came across Jeff Galloway (check out his blog for some great tips on getting started), and I have utilized his walk run method to increase my distances.
Whatever resources you use, eating right, supplementing your diet with omega-3, and practicing mindfulness/meditation is the first step in harnessing worry.
Success Factor #2: Complete a Risk Assessment.
This is a great way to face your worries head on and to come up with a strategic plan that will turn fear into solutions. This formula comes from the resource Thoughts & Feelings: Taking Control of Your Moods and Your Life Workbook. I encourage you to make a regular practice of putting down in black and white your thoughts and feelings.
While this method may take some practice and discipline, it will give you a sense of control over fear. I’m going to use the following example of worry over getting laid off from a job as a way of showing you how the risk assessment works.
First, write down your feared event
I’ll get laid off
Automatic Thoughts
(these are the thoughts that run through your mind, associated with the feared event)
I won’t be able to get another job. There aren’t any jobs for me out there with this economy. How will we be able to pay the rent/mortgage?
Rate anxiety from 0-100: 70
Rate probability of event from 0-100%: 60
Assuming the worst happens:
- Predict the worst possible consequences: I’ll be a failure. I won’t be able to pay the mortgage. We’ll go bankrupt!
Possible coping thoughts:
I can prepare for the possibility of a lay-off. I can look into purchasing insurance that will pay the mortgage in case I am laid off. The economy is tough, but my company is doing pretty well, from the review of the year to date financials.
Possible coping actions:
Research mortgage insurance. Talk to my manager about her/his perception of the future of my type of job over the next year to five years. Sign up for some career assessment/testing to identify other jobs/positions I may be well-suited for. Develop a plan of action to get the skills I need to be valuable in my current job and prepared for other jobs in the future.
I can read Steve Borgman’s Change Your Life The Smart Way to put my best year yet into action for 2012!
Revised prediction of consequences:
It’s not necessarily any more probable that I will get laid off than any other average person, but I can prepare for the worst and expect the best.
Re-rate anxiety from 0-100: 30
Evidence against the worse possible outcome:
The company financial statements are pretty strong. I had a very good review last year. My manager says that the outlook, while not extremely favorable, is not indicating any potential layoffs.
Re-rate anxiety from 0-100: 30
Re-rate probability of event from 0-100%: 40
So, to summarize:
Worrying can be good for your health if you do the following:
a) Accept the Worry
Don’t try to banish it from your mind. Acknowledge it as a normal part of life.
b) Eat Right, Exercise, and Relax
Practice good nutrition and supplementation, get your aerobic exercise in 3-4 times per week, and practice meditation and mindfulness (at least 1-2 times a day during lunch breaks or other breaks).
c) Use the risk assessment form
as described above to write out your feared events, to change your thinking pattern from negative/catastrophic to reality based/constructive, and to realign your attitude to one of embracing life as an adventure!
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photo credit: hkvam
About Stephen Borgman
Great tips, Steve!
Worry can be very uncomfortable if you don’t take any action for it.
I love the risk assessment approach – decide about what the worst possible thing which can happen is and perform the reality checks. I often use this technique and it certainly works,
Thanks for sharing!
marc van der linden recently posted..The 8 gratitude questions – the seven evenings challenge (Day 3)
Marc, I agree with all of the above. In addition to reality checks, performing problem solving and writing down actual actions we can take to avoid our feared scenarios is very liberating. When I realized that I could use worry to activate problem solving versus just sitting and stewing in my “worry” stew, it was a happy day
Caring for yourself is incredibly important.
Eating write, exercising and relaxing are insanely important.
I was recently reading about massage and how that can help reduce depression and stress.
Worry on the other hand can make you creative!
If you are afraid of something or nervous you can sit up a whole evening and just come up with idea after idea to make you successful.
That is a powerful tool.
I did this thursday evening. I sat up for to hours and wrote down 10 pages of ideas that I am now implementing into my business.
The results are already great!
Twitter: steveborgman
says:
Daniel, thanks for the comment. Massage sounds terrific! I love your example: you sat down with your worry and harnessed it into creative solutions. That’s the way it should be!
Steve-Personal Success Factors recently posted..Disregard This Advice To Remain Mediocre!
Twitter: lizkimeria
says:
HI Steven:
This is a great article. I wasn’t sure at the beginning how worrying could be good for me. But the more I read the more it made sense. As long as you don’t get stuck and paralyzed worrying and fearing,, you can turn that into a very positive energy and can be the driving forces to getting something positive done. I love success factor number two – taking a risk assessment. Thanks for sharing.
Liz K : Success From Home Trainining recently posted..Taking Your Direct Sales Marketing Business Online
Twitter: steveborgman
says:
Liz, I’m glad you enjoyed the article. The risk assessment form is really helpful because it’s grounded in cognitive behavior research, and shown to really work!
Steve-Personal Success Factors recently posted..Warning: Worrying May Be Good For Your Career!
Don’t try to banish it from your mind. Acknowledge it as a normal part of life.
I was never the type of person who knows how to handle my fears and worries. But lately I have been accepting that as what you have said its part of a persons life. what I do is use my worries and fears to motivate me to do something to prevent it. And it works all the time. I kind of loving the feeling because it shows that i am forced to make an action about this particular situation. Just exactly what you are talking about in this article.Great Post!
Crescele recently posted..The Things We Say!
Cresclele, I love that you are accepting your worry and using it to motivate you to take action. You’re definitely benefiting if you’re problem solving versus ruminating
Hi Seven, Awesome article! When I start to worry, I think of it as a red flag in my head. I know I can never base my actions on fear. But sometimes it does get to me. But that little red flag makes me realize that it is not reality. I often follow a few steps above. I have a Wii and that gets out the energy. I think everyone should have one on hand for immediate exercise. Also there are so many coping mechanisms. Right now I am in a D.B.T. Which is a behavior therapy whereby you learn how to address the feeling, and deal with it. It is a process but it is working fine. Thanks for the information above it was really helpful.
Donna
Donna Merrill recently posted..Do You Believe In “The Power of Prayer”?
Twitter: steveborgman
says:
Donna, I’m a big fan of DBT (dialectal behavior therapy). I’ve had the privilege of going to a couple DBT conferences, and I use dialectal behavior therapy with many of my clients. A lot of the theory is rooted in mindfulness and acceptance. I think every single person I know, including myself, benefits from reading up on it.
Steve-Personal Success Factors recently posted..Give Me Five Myths And I’ll Give You The Truth!
Twitter: coachestraining
says:
Thanks for sharing this Steve. Worrying keep us alert to dangers, prompt us to solve problems and motivate us to prepare to give our best performance. I believe that we might not change bad habits unless we worry about the results.
Jeffrey Sooey recently posted..Caution: Death to Personal Success Coaching Businesses
Twitter: steveborgman
says:
“Worrying keep us alert to dangers, prompt us to solve problems and motivate us to prepare to give our best performance.” Great statement! I think I’m going to adopt this as my new mantra! Thanks, Jeffrey
Steve-Personal Success Factors recently posted..Do You Know How to Succeed Like an Olympian?
Hi Stephen,
After reading you Blog title on your home page, I was all ready to come crashing in here and tear you a new hole, when I realized that you where just trying to get me to come on in here and get “pitched”. Wow. Your blog is truly a sales pitch a paragraph, man.
I guess it just goes to show you that you can steal great content from others, spin a great “eye catching title” and sell the crap out of just about anything on a blog, right?
David, I’m sorry you got that impression. I do promote books and resources I find helpful, but I’m never trying to strictly sell for the sake of selling. Everything I promote, I have used myself, and I pass it along within the context of the article. My aim is to help my readers. I’m sorry you perceived it this way, but I do appreciate your pointed and honest feedback, because it’s given me pause to think about how I write.
Twitter: MUTUNGA
says:
Stephen,
They say fear is one of the greatest motivators of change and action so worrying may be a good thing to a degree. You need to have a healthy fear and very high confidence.
Dewane Mutunga recently posted..5 Things Killing Your Sales and Keeping Customers Away
Dewane: I love it: “You need to have a healthy fear!” Worry is probably a natural inclination we have built in to our makeup (fight or flight). But when the “flight” takes over, we lose our “fight”. And that’s where high confidence comes in.
Twitter: jaclyncastro
says:
Stephen you had me at “worry” in your title, haha!
Learning HOW to react and knowing how to handle all the madness in our life are definitely excellent ways to win and conquer all the stress that it can bring.
MOVING OUR BODIES is one the best ways to combat that! Hands down! Too many people make excuses and say they will GET TO IT tomorrow, or after they get the money to hire a personal trainer, or after they buy some good workout shoes, etc. and the list goes on and on and on. What they need is for someone to just get behind them and yell “RUUUUUUNN!!!”. Hahaha, love Tony Robbins (that’s what he said).
Congratulations on your first ever marathon Stephen! What an accomplishment that very few people can say they’ve done. I am also a huge fan of Jillian Michaels. Can’t get enough of her mindset and female strength!
Jaclyn Castro@ Internet Marketing for the Beginner recently posted..Do as Jim Rohn says “If you can’t change your Friends, change your Friends”
Thanks for your kind words, Jaclyn. One of my unique moments in my marathon was running beside a woman who gave birth immediately following the marathon! (for real!).
But as you say, running and other forms of exercise literally help us work the stress out of our bodies. Exercise makes a huge positive difference for those who practice it regularly. And we can start small! Just do 5 minutes a day for a week, then move up to 6 minutes a day the next week, and so on….
Twitter: joyce_edwards
says:
Hey Steve, Great post. I have learn to not to worry. It is just a drain on my energy and things seem to happen for a reason. Although I don’t exercise as I should, I do what my diet. You give some excellent suggestions on how to releive stress and I love that you take time throughout the day to do you meditations.
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Twitter: martyinmaui
says:
Great article and tips Steve. I normally manage to do a pretty good job of staying positive, regardless of what’s going on around me. But I definitely see the benefit of meditation and have been working on incorporating that into my day. Problem is I’m a little too antsy to stay in one place for long – but I’m working on it. Thanks for the inspiration!
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Marquita, thank you so much. Even though it can be difficult for us to stay long in one place, meditation is helpful in that it helps us live in the moment. When we get too far off in the future or the past, we miss the greatest gift, the Present
Hi Steve
Thanks for this good info , it is amazing how people think it is ok to warry about every thing in live.
I just get mad if i hear the word Worry , The say go “If you worry you die , if you don’t worry you also die, so ? why Worry”
Worry is the Law of Attraction the wrong way around , that is when people say it does not work but no one ask them
what there prominent thought’s was before bad stuff happen to them , JOB in the Bible is one of the Best Examples of it.
Best Regards
Theuns
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Theuns, I’m glad that you are spreading the message of gratitude to all of us. Gratitude is probably one of the strongest remedies for worry, because it focuses our mind on what’s good in our lives.
Twitter: prfuller
says:
Hey Steve
Interesting post. Personally I tend not to worry so maybe I am unconsciously doing risk assessment
If you are ready for any outcome about the thing you are worrying about chances are you won’t worry.
Peter
Peter Fuller MBA recently posted..How to Build Your Prospect List
Peter, because you are taking action for your financial future, I know you’re not too concerned in that area. Thanks for stopping by!
Bosses and business owners do want people who worry when things don’t get done and who keep on working until they find solutions, rather than people who do not have the ‘sense of urgency’ or determination to figure out the solutions within schedule.
And I also observed that people in the office who have the most energy and are reliable problem-solvers are usually those people who practice meditation and are involved in some exercise program.
I have also read stories about executives who experienced failure and were burnt-out were able to turn their career around by running to lose weight, re-sharpen their minds, and get their energy back at a high-level. So the advice above may be simple, but they are proven to work.
CelinaMac recently posted..How Music Can Aid Running Performance
Celina, thank you for your tips. I read an article in Runner’s Magazine about runners in New York City who went to a sports psychologist. The prescription for their depression was to run in nature: in other words, in a forest preserve or some other nature type setting. When they did that, inevitably their depression would clear up! Nature has a very de-stressing effect on us.
Stephen,
You have clarified so much about how worry comes about and then what practical steps we can take to overcome the particular feared situation. A lot of what you talk about is preparation – feeling the fear, starting to worry, and then preparing for the worst by taking action steps now (taking a skills assessment, purchasing insurance, getting trained in a new skill). Valuable pointers. Thank you.
Dr. Erica
Dr. Erica Goodstone recently posted..Are You Manifesting Love in YOUR Life?
Twitter: steveborgman
says:
Thank you very much, Dr. Erica, for your feedback. It struck me, just now, that there are times when worry and anxiety can be really incapacitating. During those times, it may be helpful to seek professional help to get to a point where we are able to feel the worry without letting it overwhelm us.
Steve-Personal Success Factors recently posted..Warning: Worrying May Be Good For Your Career!
Twitter: raenalynntweet1
says:
Hi Stephen,
I love this! You completed two accomplishments. First the education provided to turn worrying around by using three success factors along with suggested resource are helpful to those who worry. The risk assessment process is very practical and almost scientific! Second, your article nicely introduces and promotes your marketing information product you recently created!
I especially appreciate the Risk Assessment section of the article and how it reduces worry and stress. When something happens which leads to worry, those initial thoughts are dangerous!
Complete a Risk Assessment. (Shows your example results)
First, write down your feared event
Automatic Thoughts
Rate anxiety from 0-100: (70)
Rate probability of event from 0-100%: (60)
Assuming the worst happens:
Possible coping thoughts:
Possible coping actions:
Revised prediction of consequences:
Re-rate anxiety from 0-100: (30)
Evidence against the worse possible outcome:
Re-rate anxiety from 0-100: (30)
Re-rate probability of event from 0-100%: (40)
Secondly, you suggested “Steve Borgman’s Change Your Life The Smart Way to put my best year yet into action for 2012!” which is a great way to promote your awesome product. Thanks Steve!
Raena Lynn
Raena, thank you. Actually, the risk assessment comes straight out of cognitive behavior research, which is scientific! And thanks for noting that I provide resources. I only promote that which I myself have used and that I feel will bring value to you and other readers.
Being worried is what kept you alive in the cave man days. The thing that sucks about anxiety is sometimes you worry about things that aren’t as important as much as you worry about things that are.
Awesome article.
Saul, I’m glad you enjoyed the article
I have never thought that worrying can be good at times. Well done! This is a very informative article about how the right intensity of worrying can have some good effects in our daily lives. I salute you for giving us more tips and knowledge. Great job!
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Prince, thanks for the kind feedback
I used to suffer from anxiety and depression and I found exercise and a healthy diet very important. I used to be vegetarian and when I went back to eating meat and increased my protein levels, things got a lot better.
Natural Remedies for Depression recently posted..The 5 Best Natural Herbs for Depression
That’s an interesting perspective. I wonder if there are any vegans or vegetarians reading this: how do you respond?
Insightful post! I believe Tony Robbins has said something similar in terms of “visualizing the worst possible outcome”. I tend to worry a lot myself (especially over financial matters) and as I’ve been in a situation where I’ve had to worry about my finances in the past, I always remember that at the end of the day, you’ll find a way to make it work. Also, I’d like to point out the great effects of having an exercise routine. It helps tremendously not only with your physical health, but your mental health as well!
Joseph @ Natural Sleeping Remedies recently posted..Eastern Remedies
Joseph, thanks for pointing out the impact of financial worry upon our lives. It’s important to focus the energy we use worrying upon coming up with solutions: reaching out, if necessary to others for help.