“The mind is its own place, and in it self
Can make a Heav’n of Hell, a Hell of Heav’n.”
–John Molton
Yikes! The title probably caught your attention. What beliefs do you have about success and personal excellence? What programs do you have downloaded in the massive computer that is called your brain? Are they a plus in your quest for self-help motivation and personal growth development? Or are they holding you back and limiting what you will be able to achieve?
photo credit: Camdiluv ♥
I give all the credit to Anthony Robbins from one of his first books, Unlimited Power : The New Science Of Personal Achievement
Self Help Motivation Belief #1: Everything Happens For A Reason And A Purpose
Life is what we make it, always has been, always will be. ~Grandma Moses
Marilyn Hamilton was a teacher and beauty queen from Fresno, California. She survived a terrible accident after a hang-gliding accident that left her paralyzed below the waist.
She certainly could have focused on what she could no longer do. Instead, she channeled her thinking and energy on possibilities open to her. From the outset, she the limitations of her wheelchair frustrated her. She figured she could design a better one. She worked with a couple of friends who designed hang gliders.
They went on to form a company called Motion Designs, which revolutionized the wheelchair industry, and went on to become California’s Small Business of the Year. The company became a multi-million dollar enterprise.
I can tell you that the following responses to her situation would NOT have helped: Blaming, getting angry, stewing in self-pity, becoming a victim of helplessness.
Instead, she expected the following:
- that her best efforts would be successful
- that there was potential in every situation, no matter how negative it might seem
- that it was worth it to let go of anger, grief, blame (we need to honor and acknowledge this emotions, but then let them go)
Self Help Motivation Belief #2: There Is No Such Thing As Failure
The men who try to do something and fail are infinitely better than those who try to do nothing and succeed. ~Lloyd Jones
Notice the difference between what happens when a man says to himself, “I have failed three times,” and what happens when he says, “I am a failure.” ~S.I. Hayakawa
There is a man who failed in business at age 21.
He was defeated in a legislative race at age 22.
He failed again in business at age 24.
He overcame the death of his girlfriend at age 26.
He had a nervous breakdown at age 27.
He lost a congressional race at age 34.
He lost a congressional race at age 36.
He lost a senatorial race at age 45.
He failed in an effort to become vice-president at age 47.
He lost a senatorial race at age 49.
He was elected president of the United States at age 52.
The man’s name was Abraham Lincoln.
He would not have accomplished becoming president if he had believed that failure was something to avoid. Thomas Edison thought the same way about failure when going through his 9,999 attempts to invent the light bulb.
What is your attitude toward failure?
Self Help Motivation Belief #3: Whatever Happens, Take Responsibility
The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs. ~Joan Didion
Great leaders and achievers share this belief in common: “I am responsible. I’ll take care of it.”
New anchor Dan Rather states that President Jack Kennedy became a true leader during the Bay of Pigs incident.
From Wikipedia’s account:
The Bay of Pigs Invasion (known as La Batalla de Girón, or Playa Girón in Cuba), was an unsuccessful attempt by a CIA-trained force of Cuban exiles to invade southern Cuba, with support from US government armed forces, to overthrow the Cuban government of Fidel Castro.
Kennedy knew what ever great leader knows: Thos who take responsibility are in power. Those who avoid it are dis-empowered. And the same principle is true in your personal and professional life.
Self Help Motivation Belief #4: It’s Not Necessary To Understand Everything To Be Able To Use Everything
Inspirations never go in for long engagements; they demand immediate marriage to action. ~Brendan Francis
Action is eloquence. ~William Shakespeare
Truly successful people have a tendency toward action. There are many of us who wish to know all the facts before taking action. By the time we have done so, someone else has already taken that action and capitalized on it. This does NOT mean taking foolhardy and impulsive actions without effective planning.
But, once you have a strong plan, and once you have absorbed the facts before you, don’t be afraid to Take Action. Consistently, daily, one small step after one small step.
Successful people balance knowledge with action. There were probably plenty of scientists and engineers at Stanford and Cal Tech who knew more about computer circuitry than Steve Jobs or Steve Wozniack, but Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniack were the ones who were most effective in using what they had to get Big Results.
Jay Abraham, a small business consultant with an incredible tack record, has written a great book on this topic: Getting Everything You Can Out of All You’ve Got: 21 Ways You Can Out-Think, Out-Perform, and Out-Earn the Competition
Self Help Motivation Belief #5: People Are Your Greatest Resource
When I worked at an educational institution as a personal counselor and advisor in the student services department, I was struck by how the President of the college interacted with every person he came in contact with: from the ‘least’ important person to the ‘most’ important person. Like all people and leaders of excellence, he had a tremendous sense of respect and appreciation for people. When you spoke to him, he never interrupted, and his eyes were riveted on you. He always asked penetrating questions, and then listened, leaning forward, and not missing a detail.
Great business and personal leaders set high goals for themselves, but have the humility to listen carefully, show appreciation for, and treat fairly those whom they work with.
The key here is that they do NOT see people as ‘things’ to be manipulated for a bottom line. They fully undertand that nothing than be acomplished apart from partnership with other people. But they serve those people and respect them; they do not seek to manipulate or deceive them.
One great book that summarizes this concept is The SPEED of Trust: The One Thing That Changes Everything
Self-Help Motivation Belief #6: Work Is Play
“When I work, I relax; doing nothing or entertaining strangers makes me tired.” Pablo Picasso
The key to finding work you love is to monitor your attitude and bring passion to what you do, while also discovering your passions and strengths. By designing your life mission statement, goals, and values, you can move ever forward toward bringing what you love together with what you do.
There are no dead-end jobs. The only dead-end jobs are those jobs in which a person who is performing the job has lost the sense of possibility, has refused to take responsibility for his/her life, and who has come to believe that failure is the only consequence of everything s/he tries.
Here is your challenge: bring the same curiosity and vitality to your job and your work as you do to your play. Pay attention to your strengths, and grow them. Pay attention to your weaknesses, and come up with a self development plan of action to minimize your weaknesses and maximize your strengths. Give it 100%!
Self Help Motivation Belief #7: There’s No Abiding Success Without Commitment
The drops of rain make a hole in the stone not by violence but by oft falling. ~Lucretius
Larry Bird was one of the best basketball players from the 1980′s. But he was seemingly slow, could not jump, and often seemed like he was playing in slow motion in comparison to some of the more fluid players around him.
Michael Jordan, one of the greatest basketball players of all time, was cut from his high school basketball team.
Steve Jobs was fired from the very same company that he founded!
And you read about all of Abraham Lincoln’s failed attempts before he became President of the United States.
What was the difference all of these people had in common versus thousands of others who have never gone anywhere in their lives, and are living lives of quiet desperation and mediocrity?
One word: Commitment.
It means practicing harder.
It means playing harder.
It means having more mental toughness.
It means getting more out of what you have than others around you.
It means taking more action than those around you.
It means developing a support group of others who support and inspire you, versus bringing you down.
It means studying the lives and key beliefs of those who have succeeded, and of those who are succeeding.
Equipped with these 7 beliefs, I believe that you will make a huge impact.
In the words of Erma Bombeck, columnist, author, and comedian:
When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, “I used everything you gave me.”
May these beliefs help you get there!
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About Stephen Borgman
Hey Steve,
Great post! These 7 beliefs are spot on,
‘Stand on the shoulder of Giants’ … it’s an expression I always have remembered after I heard it for the first time. And all these 7 beliefs stand on the shoulders of giants.
I love especially Belief7 about commitment: all the giants have been dwarfs in the eyes of others before they grew and got personal success. Determination grown from committed is the most powerful emotion you ever can have. It means listening to the inspiration of your soul and go for it – no matter what – it is hard like you say and you never know whether you gonna win. It is a gamble, but only gamblers know what life is.
Thanks for sharing!
marc van der linden recently posted..How to use positive emotions
Twitter: steveborgman
says:
Marc, thanks for the encouragement. Yes, it’s often true that if we measure ourselves by the opinions of others, we can remain small. We must connect with others who are supportive, like minded, visionary, full of faith, so that we can together grow into giants
Steve-Personal Success Factors recently posted..These 7 Lies Will Sabotage Your Success
Stephen,
What a comprehensive list of beliefs that can truly help someone go from unsuccessful to becoming a huge success. I love your examples of highly successful people who failed, often many times. I also love your recommendation to study people who are already successful and to do wait until you know everything before taking action.
Good job. This could be a small ebook. Very important, well-written, and valuable information.
Warmly,
Dr. Erica
Dr. Erica Goodstone recently posted..Are you a love connector or disconnector?
Twitter: steveborgman
says:
Dr. Erica, thanks for the kind words. You’ve shared the great story of Jack Canfield, best-selling author of Chicken Soup for the Soul. I can’t remember how many hundreds of rejections he had to go through, but it’s a good thing he didn’t give up!
Steve-Personal Success Factors recently posted..Discover the Secret of Future Proofing Your Career
Hey Steve,
Great post! Great list of beliefs! Sometimes all it takes to change the results in our life is to change the way we think and look at things. The people you have cited as examples prove that our mindset and point of view on things can make a big statement on how we do in life. I love all the beliefs you’ve shared here and I do believe in them. Thanks for sharing this! Keep it up!
Pj Zafra recently posted..Sean’s Thoughts For The Week Ahead – 9
Twitter: steveborgman
says:
PJ, thank you! One of the things I have found regarding mindset and point of view is that I have to take time to slow down and absorb God’s Presence through prayer, Scripture reading, and meditation, and gratitude. Otherwise, I can lose sight of truth and become hung up on circumstances.
Steve-Personal Success Factors recently posted..These 7 Lies Will Sabotage Your Success
Twitter: mindnod
says:
Commitment is the big one for me and it’s what I live by these days – ever since reading Mindset by Carol Dweck.
I had almost given up on learning the Piano because I thought I would never be as good as I wanted. Now I persevere with the difficult bits and eventually with practice learn to play them well enough to satisfy me.
All I can say is practice, practice, practice – things will get easier and you will to start to reap the benefits.
Chris Richards – Mindnod.com recently posted..5 great books that will help you beat procrastination. My favourite five.
Twitter: steveborgman
says:
Chris, practicing the fundamentals leads to success. Sure, we will mess up in the course of practicing, but how else can we learn! It’s good to know you are set on persevering through difficulty: that kind of tenacity comes in handy during the hard times.
Steve-Personal Success Factors recently posted..These 7 Lies Will Sabotage Your Success
These are very powerful and thanks for sharing them. I think I will focus here on #3 taking responsibility. I know I didn’t really understand what that meant and most don’t. It doesn’t mean take the blame, it means take upon yourself what you will do with what ever happens. You don’t have time to spend worrying about who is to blame. It doesn’t even really matter. But it does matter how you will use that experience, and what you are going to feel from it.
Twitter: steveborgman
says:
Lynda, I’m sure that, once you grasped the power of taking responsibility, your personal and professional results started trending upward. It’s so empowering to realize that we are capable of choosing our response to circumstances, versus feeling that we are acted upon by them.
Hey Steve,
This is good stuff man. I know how limiting beliefs hold people back, and they aren’t even aware of their own stuff. These are areas that I have become well versed in because of my own limiting beliefs, and the ability to breakthrough them and now it’s my passion to help others do the same.
We are on the same path my friend!
Thank you for this invaluable post.
Eldridge DuFauchard recently posted..Remember the Thoughts You Had Right Before You Got on a Rollercoaster?
Twitter: steveborgman
says:
Eldridge, if you’re like me, there’s no greater satisfaction than being able to share the empowerment that comes from breaking through self limiting and inaccurate beliefs: about ourselves, God, the world, and others.
Steve-Personal Success Factors recently posted..Do You Know How to Succeed Like an Olympian?
Twitter: natashanassar
says:
So interesting that I should stumble onto this post today….my husband Rich and I were just discussing this book! He said it’s the book that changed his life! I haven’t read it yet, but now I want to!
I’d have to say that #4 is the one that I find holds so many people back. Analysis Paralysis. For some reason, I’m just not wired that way. I’ve always been the person who just jumps in and tries stuff, because it’s the journey to achieving goals that is the most fun for me. Since it comes easily to me, I’ve made it a point to really encourage others to take the leap of faith and DO instead of reading about how you could do…
Absolutely LOVED this post- in fact, I printed it out, because this is something I would like to read every single morning before I start my day. It’s a great reminder : )
Natasha Nassar recently posted..The 10 Commandments of Building You, Inc.
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says:
Natasha, I truly appreciate your kind feedback. I must say, I’ve been reading your series on the 10 Commandments of Building You, Inc, and am absolutely loving it! Those posts are exactly what I’ve been looking for, so you can bet I’m bookmarking them, chewing on them, and applying them! In fact, I have my first coaching call with a personal coach this weekend to firm some of those commandments up for myself and my blogs
Steve-Personal Success Factors recently posted..Here are Success Factors That Have Helped People Prosper During the Recession
Twitter: dereck_arreguin
says:
Hey Stephen,
Great posting and WOW some of those are really powerful!
Even when it’s hard to keep trucking, its those who never give up that end up winning.
Thanks!
-Dereck
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says:
Dereck, I’m glad you found this article helpful. Keep on Truckin’!
Steve-Personal Success Factors recently posted..These 7 Lies Will Sabotage Your Success
Twitter: WillenaRose
says:
#3 – Whatever happens, take responsibility.
Years ago I was told that marriage is a 50/50 deal. Later I was told it’s a 100/100 deal. Of course the latter is true. That’s what your #3 reminds me of. In network marketing I am told that my success or failure depends on ME, not my upline. And yet, as a leader, I must take responsibility for my team. Not for their success or failure, per se, but I must take responsibility for seeing that they have EVERY opportunity to succeed. I don’t ever want to be the reason anyone quits.
GREAT list, Stephen. Thanks for sharing.
Willena Flewelling
Willena Flewelling recently posted..NaNoWriMo is November is NaNoWriMo
Twitter: steveborgman
says:
Willena, thank you for stopping by. I’m glad you found the article helpful. It’s interesting to see that leadership and self-responsibility are so closely linked.
Steve-Personal Success Factors recently posted..Here are Success Factors That Have Helped People Prosper During the Recession
Twitter: rachellavern
says:
What a wonderful post Stephen!
I think that failures offer valuable lessons and opportunities. Instead of seeing my flops as evidence of any incompetence, I like to think of them as information I can use to do better next time. Admittedly, sometimes this happens after a mini temper tantrum.
Rachel Lavern@Life for Succss recently posted..How Your Distractions Can Support You
Twitter: steveborgman
says:
Rachel, I don’t know how many times I need to both read and write this truth to myself over and over. I hope that it’s sinking in, over time, that failure can be one of the best learning tools for success. As for tantrums, just ask my wife about all the tantrums I have thrown….on second thought, maybe not
Steve-Personal Success Factors recently posted..Now You Can Be As Productive As These Top CEO’s
Twitter: incomestream
says:
Hello Stephen
The question, “What programs do you have downloaded in the massive computer that is called your brain? ” is an excellent way to describe the impact that beliefs have on our success. Florence Shinn best known for her first book, The Game of Life and How to Play It “says, “The game of life is the game of boomerangs. Our thoughts, deeds and words return to us sooner or later, with astounding accuracy.” Which to me says that your each of the seven beliefs that you list are important.
Thanks
Perry A Davis Jr
Music City
Perry A Davis Jr @Network Marketing Nut and Bolts that make building your business Fun, Simple, Magical and Profitable.s recently posted..Network Marketers! What is your most important tool?
Twitter: steveborgman
says:
Perry, thanks for the great quote from Florence Shinn. When we realize how vitally our thoughts are connected with our outcomes, we will take great care to feed our brains, hearts, and souls with good stuff!
Steve-Personal Success Factors recently posted..Warning: Worrying May Be Good For Your Career!
Love your article Steve – and I’ve been a fan of Anthony Robbins for years. In fact I was fortunate enough to see him in action here in Maui – even the whole walking on the coals thing – awesome! Each of your points are very important, but the one that really touches me is #1 everything happens for a reason and a purpose. Another way to think of that is “it’s not what happens to you, it’s what you do about it.” That comes directly from my favorite motivational speaker W. Mitchell who suffered horrific burns in two major accidents – but went on to have a successful career and a family. Amazing guy. Thanks for the inspiration!
marquita herald recently posted..Always Crazy Busy? Warning Signs you May be Addicted to Stress.
Twitter: steveborgman
says:
It’s truly amazing how our attitude and outlook on life relates to our quality of life. I can’t imagine myself walking on coals, be we all have circumstances that are like coals in our lives. And to think of that speaker, and of so many others who have overcome incredible deficits in their lives, it truly inspires me to “up” my game in life.
Steve-Personal Success Factors recently posted..Do You Know How to Succeed Like an Olympian?
The opening quote is from John MILTON (not Molton)’s epic poem Paradise Lost.
Other than that, I enjoyed the article.
Thanks for the correction, Katy
Hi Steve, great article! I didn’t know those stuff about Abe Lincoln. Amazing huh? If he could fail so much and still be president who are we to quit right? This is truly inspiring. Thanks for sharing.
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Great points, Stevie!
Hey Stephen,
3 – Whatever happens, take responsibility.
I used to think that I was 50% responsible for all the relationships in my life and held the other person to the other 50%.
Then through some great books, and classes I found out that I was 100% responsible for any relationship I was in. And the other person was 0%.
People need to take responsibility!
Twitter: raenalynntweet1
says:
Hi Steve,
Fantastic Post! All 7 Beliefs are practical examples how man overcomes his/her weaknesses. You covered so much information that I would like to list the 7 Self-Help Motivational Beliefs:
#1:Everything Happens For A Reason And A Purpose
#2: There Is No Such Thing As Failure
#3: Whatever Happens, Take Responsibility
#4: It’s Not Necessary To Understand Everything To Be Able To Use Everything
#5: People Are Your Greatest Resource
#6: Work Is Play
#7: There’s No Abiding Success Without Commitment
When I grew up, the Abraham Lincoln failure list was presented to me many times and I’ve always used it as a guide to realize how extreme failure can get! When I feel I am “failing” I’ve always reflect back to his list and he is a great example of perseverance. If he can do it, so can I!
I would also like to comment on Commitment. If I had to pick one as the most important, this one is at the top of the list. Without Commitment, nothing happens and all the rest are irrelevant. You certainly gave a lot of opportunity for thought an reflection. Thanks for this very interesting summary.
Raena Lynn
Raena Lynn recently posted..Three Ways To Stir Up Pinterest. 2.7 Million Monthly Users
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says:
Stephen,
Number One hits home. While everything does happen for a reason, we have the control to dictate the outcome. Never do we have to just “accept” anything. We get what we strive for ultimately.
Dewane Mutunga recently posted..Personalizing Your Business
Dewane, you make a great point. I think of Victor Frankl, the father of existential philosophy. When he was in the concentration camps in Nazi Germany, I’m sure this belief would have been very hard to accept. But he chose to envision how he would live life: he knew that the Nazi soldiers could not imprison his spirit: and thus he learned that we can choose how to respond versus react to our circumstances.