How To Get Unstuck?
We all know that we need to set goals. We all know we need a mission statement. We started out so gung-ho at the beginning of the year. But now it’s been a few months and, and….well….we just don’t have the same amount of gumption that we had at the outset of this year. We just…feel…so….lazy.
Or, you may have started out on your goals, and you find that your strategies just are not working. You may have started a business that has not taken off. You may have taken a promotion, but found that it was not a good fit for you. You may have gone out on a few dates, just to find out that the other person does not feel the same about you as you feel about them, or the reverse.
Here’s how to get unstuck.
Adjust Your Attitude
Failure, disappointment, and laziness can have a way of influencing our thought patterns. Over time, if we think negatively enough and become sour enough, our attitudes will attract the very misery we say we do not want into our lives. Acknowledge your disappointment, but don’t wallow in it, or it may be a slippery slope down, and you may never get back up to the top.
Don’t Compromise Your Integrity
In times of failure and disappointment, our character can be tested, and it can be easy to take shortcuts to attempt to reach our goals. Be sure to stay true to your core values, and to practice ethical behavior and decision-making. In the end, if you have remained true to ethical behavior, you will experience the peace and serenity that only doing the right thing can bring.
Stay With It
Example: in the 1940’s, a young inventor took his idea to 20 different corporations over 7 years. All of them turned him down, until he finally got a tiny company in Rochester, New York, the Haloid Company, to buy the right to his electrostatic paper-copying process. Haloid became the Xerox Corporation.
Keep Looking For Opportunities
A young man, Mr. Booth, was sitting on his porch enjoying a Midwestern sunset. As he watched the dust swirling in the wind, he thought to himself, “What if man could reverse the wind, so that the wind could suck the dust, instead of blowing it?” Thus was the idea for the vacuüm cleaner born. Ideas are all around us, but we need to have the positive, curious, engaged mindset to be open for the opportunities to present themselves, and to take advantage of those opportunities.
Finally, Forget Those Who Say You Can’t
This hall of “failures” turned to “fame” should encourage you, when you face negative people around you who say you cannot do the things you dream of doing:
- Benjamin Franklin and psychologist Carl Jung were poor mathematicians.
- Albert Einstein did not speak until age 5, and was considered ‘mentally slow’
- Inventor James Watt was declared to be ‘dull and inept’
- Cartoonist Walt Disney was fired from his first job because he had ‘no imagination’
- Inventor Thomas Edison was asked to leave school at age 9 because he was at the bottom of his class
- Writer Edgar Allen Poe, poet Percy Bysshe Shelley, and painter James Whistler were all expelled from school.
- Grandma Moses was not exactly successful in her youth: she developed her talent, and achieved all her fame and success after age 80.
- Abraham Lincoln had the equivalent of three months of school, and people ridiculed him for his appearance.
photo credit: Rochelle, just rochelle
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I read a fantastic book on motivation entitled Get Motivated by Tamara Lowe. She’s discovered that we all fall into 3 categories called Drives, Needs and Awards. And if we figure out where we fall, we have a better chance of motivating ourselves. For instance under Awards, you either like external awards or internal awards. Some people like praise at the morning meeting. Others like to be praised privately.
So when you know which one you are, you can set yourself up for success.
Debbie@Left Brain Right Brain recently posted…Left Brain Right Brain Entrepreneurs
Debbie, thanks for this interesting information! Have you written any articles/posts on this subject? If so, I’d like to check them out! I’m going to have to look the book up as well. Thank you for your contribution 🙂
I haven’t written any posts yet, but I have them in the queue.
Debbie@Left Brain Right Brain recently posted…Left Brain Right Brain Entrepreneurs
I’ll be looking forward to them!
Motivation is a funny thing. When we need it the most it is the most difficult to find.
I love the stories of the “failures”, One of my favorite is the Beatles who were turned down by a few recording studios and then became the greatest pop group ever,.
Often we see people who are at the top of their profession or hob by or whatever. We rarely see the hours of work they have put in to get there.Tiger Woods started playing golf at age 4 I believe but how many years was it before he became famous. I wonder how many times he thought of giving it up…
Trevor@Money Advice recently posted…Special Deals Are Everywhere
Trevor, thank you for stopping by 🙂 I remember the Beatles being cited as an example of the 10,000 hours of practice it takes to master our craft. Recently, I saw a video about the Chinese Bamboo plant. For five years, nothing appears to happen. Then, in a period of weeks, it shoots up 90 feet! It takes five years for its roots to grow deep enough to withstand that type of growth. When we get discouraged with the journey, we must remember that our job is to persist in our daily actions toward our goals. Our roots are growing, and success is not far off!
Stephen,
We have to just keep going and listen within for guidance. I have learned to not ask others to guide me on my journey.
Justin@Mazzastick recently posted…How To Transform Yourself
I think I would agree with you to a point, Justin. But there is also wisdom in consulting with coaches and mentors who are a few steps ahead of us at times, would you not agree?
Only you know the personal journey that you are on a coach only knows what they know and their own unique experiences. In my ideal world people would become more self-reliant and less dependent on others for direction.
I admit there are troubling times in our lives that may cause us to lose access to our own inner-guidance and at those times you may get assistance from someone who is very intuitive to your needs.
Justin@Mazzastick recently posted…How To Transform Yourself
Thanks for expanding on your thoughts, Justin 🙂
Great article Stephen. I was especially impressed with your advice to ignore naysayers. There will always be those who are quick to criticize, but I think those are the easy one’s to ignore – it’s the well meaning friends who cause us to second guess ourselves that can cause the real damage. The hardest thing to do is love em for who they are, while staying true to our own inner voice.
Marquita Herald recently posted…Master Delegation- Let Go and Trust Other People
Marquita, thank you for pointing out that it’s the ones who are most ‘well meaning’ who may be the hardest to ignore. That’s why, as you say, it’s important to stay true to our own intuition, principles, and values. At the same time, it helps to align ourselves with others who have similar values and missions.
Wow that’s one droggy picture you got there. I think that someone is on a slump, it is okay for that person to stay there at least for a couple more times. That slump could actually be the one to rise him up. That slump could be the one to refresh him and get him back to his senses.
Slumps can sometimes be good when we are just so overburdened. We need to refresh too.
Marco Lee recently posted…Claim Your New Life!
Marco, it’s true that sometimes the hardest times in our lives are the ones that cause us to grow the most.
Another tip for “de-slumping” ourselves is to look at what we have accomplished. Often, we fall into a slump when we focus on how far we have yet to go. While it’s important to “keep our eyes on the prize,” we should also periodically stop and look behind us, back to the starting point: where we were when we began this journey or undertake this challenge. When we measure our progress, we realize that forward movement has occurred and can continue to occur, and that might just be enough to push us up and out of the rut we have fallen in. It’s one of the techniques I teach in my Rut-Busting Workshops, and people are always amazed at what they have already done when they stop and analyze it.
Change Coach Nancy Christie recently posted…Sometimes it’s the small steps that lead to success
Nancy, celebrating our accomplishments is huge. Levi Strauss used to keep a victory notebook on his desk for the very same reason. By reviewing his victories, he was encouraged to take the next big steps of whatever challenges he might be facing. Great point!
Stephen
Great post. I sometimes feel at my wits end. Positive attitude and not compromising ones integrity as you have mentioned is very important. Every time when I read articles from wonderful post such as your I get the gist to pick myself up and strive on. Picking up and being affirmative with oneself will help one towards heading to the right directions. We have to be positive and not get sucked in by people who are negative, as they work like virus and invade your positive thoughts.
Irene, it really is a learned habit to monitor our thoughts and attitudes and to change them from negative to positive. One of the best ways to do this is to focus on your goals and on the blessings in your current life. Gratitude is one of the greatest antidotes to pessimism 🙂
Hi Steven
What a great post you lend from Zig, I love him for the lat 15 years.
all the people he mention just inspire me . I wander how many people know
this about Thomas Edison or Walt Disney? especially the doom Sayers in life.
I just give me hope for my own dream that i am working on on this very moment
do you also know that Walt Disney was also Bankrupt 7 time before he start Disneyland?
Thanks you give me new hope.
Regards
Theuns
PS see my blog about “My opus vs dreams and goals.” and be so kind and leave me a comment.
Theuns recently posted…The Subconscious Mind- The Subconscious Mind and the BIOS of a Computer
Theuns, it’s really interesting to think about. Would you and I have the fortitude to go bankrupt 7 times before starting our next company? It’s inspirational to think about (not that I want to go bankrupt, but to persist to the same degree that he did 🙂
Hi Steve
Thanks for the reply, Well to be honest with you this is were i am on this moment
bankrupt but you know what it don’t pull me down it just make me more
determinant to accomplish me goals and Opus as i did tell you .
Love to hear your feed back on it als look at all the great comments i already
have and that is only on what they read on my website and blog.
Regards Theuns 🙂
Theuns recently posted…By- William Earl Amis- Jr III
Theuns, this increases my respect for you all the more. I’ll definitely be stopping by your blog to read about what you’ve been pursuing, as well as the passion that keeps you going 🙂
This is so true!- Finally, Forget Those Who Say You Can’t
Negative people can really get you down and decrease your motivation. I know I have experienced this before many times. I just then refocus my attention to positive things and people and it seems to help. We also have to keep that variety in our activities so that we don’t get board. People can tell when we are in a slump and when we are less motivated, when we are being productive and positive it radiates from us. 🙂
LeeAnn Townsend recently posted…Is the your business opportunity better off worked at home or what
LeeAnn, thanks for re-affirming this point. I like the idea of keeping variety in your activities, so that you can turn to those activities as a way of getting out of a slump.
Goal setting is a great way to not only get out, but stay out of a slump…..I also liked your examples of the many successful people who overcame obstacles to achieve their dreams. If we all look closely we’ll find that every successful person in any field has been in a slump at one point and overcame it to achieve success. That’s the difference between winners and quitters.
Steve Dooley recently posted…Team Beachbody Scam – Let’s Take An Unbiased Look At The Team Beachbody Opportunity
Steve, thanks for your comment. I’m admiring Kevin Durant, start forward for the Oklahoma Thunder. After a terrible game 6, he told reporters he had a dream the next night. They asked if it was a nightmare. He replied that it was no nightmare, he was dreaming of the buckets he was going to be making in game 7! Now that’s what I call faith and confidence! 🙂
Steve,
Great post. I, for one, have not stopped since this year began. I started out running by creating a blogtalkradio show on January 1st and the momentum has continued all these months. 2011 is probably one of the most productive years of my life – and it feels good, although a bit overwhelming at time.
Erica
Dr. Erica Goodstone recently posted…Do You Know Your Relationship Mission
Dr. Erica, I can certainly tell, from reading your blog and your comments, that you are one busy person! You have a great mission: helping others through love! The fact that you feel a little overwhelmed shows that you are expanding yourself in a healthy way: just don’t forget to take breaks along the way 🙂
Steve-Personal Success Factors recently posted…How To Get Off Your Butt When You’re In A Slump
Stephen, the point you made about not falling into that negative spiral is something that connected with me. It is so true, and others need to realize the power of our negative thoughts and what they can do to us and our lives. The same goes for being around other negative people, it can just affect us and spread to us, that is why we need to not be impressionable to these people and not let them impress their negative thoughts and beliefs upon us.
It is very important to just stick with what feels right and take action on those opportunities that present themselves. You have to BELIEVE in yourself.
Great post,
BW
Brandon Wraith recently posted…Do Things…Without Thinking!
Brandon, thanks for making the point about taking action with belief. It’s through taking positive and consistent actions that we learn what does and does not work. As Thomas Watson, founder of IBM said, “If you want to succeed, double your failure rate.”
Excellent article, I loved the information.
Congratulations!
Dinheiro Como Ganhar recently posted…Dinheiro Como Ganhar – Ganhar dinheiro com um Blog
Obrigado, Dinheiro 🙂
Thanks for your sharing.It’s useful post
I think that the best ways are to adjust Your Attitude and to keep Looking For Opportunities.
Failure is terrible but you must know how to escape from it and start again.Life is short you should live meaningfully
van025 recently posted…Making Your Own Computer Wallpaper
I like what you said, Jessica, about remembering that life is short: live meaningfully. Thanks for your input.
My rule: No moping for more than 48 hours over any major issue. There is to much in life that needs to be done. Another great motivating article. 🙂
Adrian, thanks for the feedback. Believe me, I am in the same boat with you on some of these things: I write for myself first, then for my readers 🙂
Stephen,
This is great! I loved your tips to get off our butt and all the examples of people who did well in life, overcoming obstacles. It’s never too late to become the person you thought you could be.
Have a wonderful day!
Lynn
Lynn Jones recently posted…Should We Really Hug Our Customers
Lynn, thank you for stopping by. Those people, and all of the other people who stop by this blog inspire me every day to get off my butt and keep going as well 🙂
Inspiring article, thank you for posting this. When you’re stuck in a rut, try to focus on the positive side of things. Try to think of your strengths instead of nitpicking your flaws.
Thank, JP! I think a healthy balance is helpful in life. It’s good to both focus on strengths, and also to take a realistic look at our flaws, and on what we can improve. Then, having done all that, it’s time to let go 🙂
Hi Stephen,
I love this post! I saw your blog from a comment you wrote on the Happiness Project blog recently.
Keeping motivation up to reach your goals is tough. Normally, I make a lot a lot of New Years resolutions and then soon enough give up on them and go back to being lazier. I don’t go running each day like I say I will, or don’t eat as healthy as I say I would.
But this year I made my goals more focused and specific, as well as more reasonable. I didn’t start out big, I started small, and made my goals public on a blog http://theshynessproject.wordpress.com/ and that has been sooo helpful for me and has kept me motivated. Having my goals be public and sharing them with others has encouraged me to keep going. Also, the fear of failure was a biggie for me. I feared even starting my self-improvement project because I feared failure and not having the courage to do what I set out to do. But I realized that the fear of failure was a silly reason to not pursue my project, so I decided to take a chance and see where it went. And so far, after 5 months, I’m still going and have faced my fears in my goals! It’s been an amazing experience, and I hope others can experience the triumph of accomplishing their goals and realizing that they have the power to do anything that they set their mind to if they can just keep moving forward.
Keep writing, and I’ll check out more of your posts soon and sign up for your newsletter!
Take Care,
Brittany
Brittany recently posted…Work Out Videos
Brittany, I’m so proud of you for all that you’ve accomplished. Your blog’s title looks very interesting, so I will be checking it out 🙂 I hope you continue to go on your journey: the world needs what you have to offer!
Stephen, since I work from home the bane of my existence is laziness. I have to find a happy medium between being a workaholic and still taking time out to do the thing I love. But you right I keep my eye open for opportunities all the time!!
Valerie recently posted…Novica Promotion Code
Valerie, you make a great point about finding a happy medium. Actually, some of us workaholics need to work on a) play and b) on working on the right priorities versus just ‘staying busy.’
Hi Stephen,
Like the others, your post is so much inspiring me, as I really needed it right now..
I love the “Adjust the attitude” point, as I guess I really needed to see into myself and adjust the bad.
Thanks!
Kimi recently posted…Thesis 181 is out – Should I upgrade my Thesis theme
Kimi, I’m so glad you were inspired: it’s part of my mission in life 🙂
I have copied this for motivation if I find myself “down in the dumps” in the future. This is truly inspirational!
Sandi recently posted…Enhancing Your Image in the Workplace with Ladies Business Suits
Sandi, I’m glad you enjoyed the article 🙂
Solid advice and I like the examples. Especially the ones with Einstein “mentally slow” and Disney having “no imagination”, lol!
I use the trick with the music when I feel down. There are some songs that can help me lift my mood and feel motivated instantly. So whenever I feel discouraged and depressed, I just listen to them and I’m able to shift my energy quickly 😉
Alison Barrows@Crash Diets recently posted…Atkins Diet Plan
Alison, yes, the examples are very motivating. I’m sure some of those people actually felt down and depressed many times, but they were able to shift their energy to move past other’s opinions.
We have to adjust our mindsets to a more positive angle. I love your tips, but I’ll try to do you one better. What I do is, I try to remember it when people say that I can’t do things, I use it as motivation to get better and prove them wrong. Nothing beats the look they get when we show them what we can really do.